Walls are created from fear.
Boundaries are created from love, we teach people how to treat us, by setting boundaries.
We can’t love our neighbor, spouse, friend, or child, if we don’t love ourselves. We just can’t. Boundaries are created out of loving ourselves and others. Nobody benefits from us hiding how we feel in order to save someone else’s feelings.
Who do we ask advice from, someone we know will be truly honest with us, or someone who will tell us what they think we want to hear?
I want to know the truth, even when it hurts.
It’s all about communication skills.
An example of a boundary might be; when someone is telling us something about another person and they are really upset with them, we might say, “whoa, it sounds like you really might want to talk to this person and tell them how you feel”. And if they continued ranting, we might say, “we have given this enough energy, let’s talk about something else.”
If we participate in gossiping we are gossiping. A boundary would be to stop gossiping in it’s tracks with kind words of compassion and grace.
We all have a right to our opinion and we don’t have to agree. Setting a boundary with someone who is determined to change our minds, is just letting them know that we love them too much to argue with them.
A boundary is about standing in our integrity, realizing everyone has the right to feel how they feel, even ourselves.
Beware, by setting these sorts of boundaries, are circle of friends may change. As we stand in acceptance, grace and integrity we automatically attract others with acceptance, grace and integrity.
I pray that today, we create boundaries based on love, and watch the walls of fear fall away.
And so it is!
blessings & love,
Until next time, BE radiant, radical & real!
DJ